November 2011
1 post
sigh.
Why is it so tough sometimes?
October 2011
6 posts
“Nobody loves me the way you do.” When...
Ambivalence.
Why is it that i feel like i’m not a part of this picture anymore?
It scares me, it really does. You’re so different. You never felt this different before.
You don’t accept my flaws, you don’t try to make me happy anymore. Is this how being taken granted for feels like?
Nights like this.. even words can’t explain it right.
It’s really sad to know that sometimes you think so little of me. How insensitive can you be? I’ve the rights to feel how I want to, I’ve the rights to that, dont I? Why don’t you see it, I’m not trying to control anything here. But it’s because of what you did, it reflects on you, on how you feel...
♥♥♥
Distance.
Isn’t it scary? Life.
Everything is so uncertain. The littlest thing makes you insecure. What more, with the distance. I’m afraid. I really am. I can’t get a grip of myself. I can’t get a grip of us. The thought of it, really scares me. I don’t know what to do.
Just 5 more weeks to go. Why can’t time pass faster. All these waiting and uncertainties are slowly...
August 2011
2 posts
Priorities.
Disappointments.
Heartbreaks.
Torture.
Death.
Love makes us all a little crazy sometimes..
It’s not true. It never does get any easier. Each time you walk through those doors, a little part of me dies inside. It breaks my heart, it really does. Only at the moment where i know it’d be the last i’ll get to feel you, that i realise you’re leaving again. There’s no way to make this any easier. No way at all.
You mean the world to me, and i cant believe...
May 2011
1 post
is it really too much to ask for?
I thought i’ve been the best i could’ve ever been. Do you know how torturous it is? Do you even appreciate what i do for us, what i gave up for us? I thought i was the best for you.
I thought i meant the world to you.
Yet you”ll rather do something that makes me unhappy over trying to make it work between us.
I really had enough.
March 2011
2 posts
This is torture.
I feel so horrible. I had the most unbearable 5hr nap of my life this afternoon. All i could think about was you, & that’s when it finally hit me.
I realised that up till the moment you walk through those gates, i hadnt accepted reality. I didnt allowed myself to accept the fact that you’re leaving again. Not till i was left alone in my room, on that empty bed, and not till...
& then, you left again.
Alone & empty on my bed.
I miss you already.
December 2010
1 post
October 2010
4 posts
i dont cry myself to bed anymore. the 2nd time seemed so much easier. well… seems. but tonight, as i lay on my bed, i thought of you. and it was a different kind of touch. its like as if ive been in denial the past 2 months. i thought of your touch, your skin on my skin, your breathe on my shoulders. how i long for that right now. i miss you so much. i miss having you around.. i miss having...
1 more month.
i cant believe i havent blogged for so long.
and dont get me wrong, it’s not that i love you any less or anything of that sort. I guess, i started getting use to it. You being away.It really doesnt make that much of a difference. We skype and bbm all the time. ohhh just how much i adore you and the things you do for me <3 <3
i love you babyG. come home soon, real soooon.
i don’t know what to say here anymore. all i know is i miss you.
i miss you. i miss you.
September 2010
8 posts
almost here.
Phone calls, skype calls and bbms are the closet things i have to you. The only physical touch. Just 50+ more days. We can do this.
I miss you. Almost, almost.
Colour Test.
Your Existing Situation Desires to be respected by others in order to gain their trust and support for her own personal gain. Your Stress Sources “Demands to be noticed by others as an important individual, needs attention and recognition. her current situation is leaving her dissatisfied. she feels she needs to make friends with those who hold the same high standards she does. Wants to...
Listen
From this moment on, everything is gonna change.
I want to hold you.
tears well up, and for once, ever so badly i just want you right here, right now.
wish you were here.
I kinda wish i have you home for mid-autumn festival, we never got to actually ever spend it together.
I kinda wish we could gobble down yummy mooncakes and set lanterns on fire. Just so you know, i love eating them.
I kinda really wish i can have you home for just pretty much whatever reason it could be.
I kinda really really miss you.
Words are flying out like / endless rain into a...
i miss you.
i miss you too much.
how long did it take the previous time for 70days to go by?
I could never love another. What’s left, is all for you.
78 more days baby..
Just 78 more days and you’ll be home in my arms. I can’t wait, i really can’t.
I can’t wait to do all these things we use to do together. Doing them without you is not the same at all. How can anything be the same without you?
Je t’aim.
August 2010
8 posts
“break, broke, broken.”
love is such a beautiful thing.
well, at least with you it is.
i can’t get enough of you. i just can’t. i don’t think i ever will. i’ll see you soon my babyboy.
phone+skype ♥♥♥
You're The Fight That's Worth.
Times like these, i wish the scent under my pillow is real. Not just a scent, but a touch.
oh how, oh how i really wish.
I miss you my bbcakes :(
War Of My Life.
” I’m not running, and I’m not scared, I am waiting, And well prepared. “
” I’ve got a hammer, And a heart of glass I gotta know right now which walls to smash I got a pocket Got no pills If fear hasn’t killed me yet, then nothing will.”
” So fight on, fight on everyone fight on got no choice but to fight til it’s done I won’t...
i'm happy.
You’ll always have my heart, and i’ll always keep yours safe in mine.
Being away from you makes me realise so much more, makes me love you so much more. I just can’t wait, can’t wait for you to be home again.
& all i can think about is you.
Time is passing so slow, too slow. I feel empty at times, i feel lost one too many times. Without you, i’m just not complete.
I’m just not complete.
You are the smell before rain, you are the blood in my veins.
-
i miss you i miss you i miss you so fucking much.
come home already? :(
you're my heart.
We live in a small town where the grass ain’t greener on the other side. I’d be a cashier girl and you’d be my fisherman. We’ll have milk and scones for the rest of our lives. & we’d sit around the fire place on Christmas being thankful for what we have.
Why can’t life be this simple?
Because,
it never is, and never will be.
At the end of the day, the...
July 2010
3 posts
goodnight, sleep tight.
I’ll hug you and keep you warm. Wish i could do that for real.
Having to do this the 2nd time makes me realise how much i love you, how much im willing to sacrifice for you. As long as we’re together, i am willing to do this over and over again. As long as it’s you.
So many things i’d have to do alone again. Nothing’s the same without you. You make things complete....
i feel so miserable without you. just yesterday you were still in my arms :’(
It doesn't feel real, i feel so empty without you....
It still kinda sucks though it’s the 2nd time you’re leaving. It feels like i’ll still see you tomorrow. Everything in my room reminds me of you. let’s just say, everything around me reminds me of you. I miss you already.
I kinda wish i’ll have you in the morning. I kinda really wish i do.
I’ll see you in 3.5 months my babyboy. Always have been, always will...
June 2010
6 posts
will you still love me in the morning?
me: *just got outta bed and went onto skype.* you: baby got just wakey look. wanna pinch your cheeks. wonders how can anyone love me in the morning. oh yes, you can. you’d still love me in the morning. forever and always ♥
call me foolish, i just need you now.
These 5months have thought me how to love someone right. I’ve learnt that not everything is about me. I’ve learnt to give in and to compromise. Never fail the other, never give up hope.
The one who makes you cry aint worth your love, or so they say. But no, theyre all wrong. The one who makes you cry is worth your love. He breaks you down to the bottomless pit, he’s the one who...
sexcited.
i’m gonna get a real kiss soon.
i’m gonna get a real hug soon.
i’m gonna get a touch of you soon.
my fingertips can’t wait.
can’t wait..
123 days.
another week or so is nothing compared to the 123days ive waited.
you said “baby wait for me k.”
why, of cos i will. forever and always.
there're so many ways to love you.
2 weeks, just 2 more weeks and you’d be home right next to me <3
i can’t wait for you to sneak into bed.
and of cos, i can’t wait to love you the way i was allowed to again.
<3
May 2010
10 posts
you can feel it when your heart breaks.
and all you want is someone but yourself to wipe those tears away.
03:15am.
oh how it breaks..
we’ve these big nice talks about the future and whatnots, about how everything is gonna go as we planned. but now i dont see how any of that means anything at all when you cant even keep to the words you say. the present. 3
just tell me what to do, really.
just wake up already…
i still remember how it feels like to be with you but it just doesn’t seem real anymore :(
i miss you so much, i wish you were here.
i remember how it’s like to be with you,
to hold your hand and fall asleep with you.
come home soon, i need you baby.
sometimes..
we just all stop and think, don’t we?
well, it slapped me in the face. reality did.
and this time, reality won.
so what if i love you, so what?
” Being a couple is hard, and committing, making sacrifices is hard. But if its the right person it is easy. Looking at that girl and knowing she is all you want in life, that should be the easiest thing in the world, and if it’s not like that, then she is not the one. (9 years into a relationship) “ How I Met Your Mother.
It’s amazing, really, just how much pain the human...
hi space. it’s been awhile since i updated this space. do you need some space?